Akushima's: Hell's Kitchen
by GrammaticalMurder
Summary: Team Scrap has enjoyed the perks of being the most popular yaoi fandom of Nitro chiral for years; however, that has all changed when a new fandom has taken over leaving the dmmd team impoverished. *FULL SUMMARY INSIDE*


Hello! It's been a while since I last made a fanfic but something happened in the middle of thenight and on a full moon. I had an idea! This is sort of a cross over but its mostly Dmmd-centric.

**Summary: After the Nitro cafe has closed its doors on the dmmd team, a plan was made in a period of desperation and insanity. Aoba and the guys will start a competing cafe. But who will manage everything? The answer will be quite unexpecting to everyone.**

Warning: This contains vulgar language, and your favorite characters having the bashing of their lives. If you know who Gordon Ramsey is, you should know what to expect from this story. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Nitro+chiRAL.

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><p>"You have to give jobs please!"Aoba pleaded with the man in front of a desk. The group has received an overwhelmingly amount of popularity within the span of a few years. Fortune has come to the group's way in abundance. With so much money, the group was able to live for years unemployed. Unfortunately, their worst nightmare has finally come true. A new yaoi fandom took over. Within a matter of weeks, all their money, their popularity, their lives have been lost. Now, all that's left for them is the chance to find jobs. The group's best chance was none other than Nitro café.<p>

"I'm sorry sir," The man of the desk told Aoba, "The Nitro café is completely occupied. There are no more jobs for you let alone your friends."

"B-b-but we…spent all our money." Aoba admitted with shame and humiliation.

"That is not our problem. Good day sir."

"Aoba," Koujaku put his hand on Aoba's shoulder, "We should just go."

"NO!" Aoba cried out. Something inside Aoba snapped; he refused to take no for an answer. In a matter of seconds, Aoba exploded in a fit of rage and babbling. "DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? I AM AOBA SERAGAKI AND THIS IS MY TEAM! OUR FANDOM WAS THE GREATEST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO THE YAOI WORLD AND WE ARE ENTITLED TO WORK IN YOUR CAFÉ! YOU ARE GOING TO FIND A SPOT FOR ME AND MY FRIENDS AND YO—"

Koujaku slapped a hand over Aoba's mouth to stop the flow of senseless bantering coming out the Queen of Peen, but the man of the desk has heard enough. As the man reached out to bring the Executioners to escort the jobless team out of the café, Aoba shouted towards the employees of the café. Aoba may not have known some of the other employees, but at least he had some history regarding the First Queen of Peen, Akira.

"Akira come on! Help us out! I thought we were friends!"Aoba's plea fell on deaf ears as Nitro's very first Queen of Peen gave him the cold shoulder. The man's harsh response gave Aoba a stabbing pain in his chest.

"Kau?"Clear softly called out to the small silver-haired boy. "Can you please help Master find a job here?" Sadly, the small boy can only let out huffs of air as he nuzzled against Clear's hand. Now it was Koujaku's to call out to the employees he thought he knew. Many streams of fluid leaked down his face as he made his pointless plea to Shiki and Rai. Shiki and Rai both put down their cooking utensils and walked towards Koujaku to listen to whatever he had to say.

"Shiki…Rai," Koujaku sniffed and wiped at his face, "I've a-always s-s-s-aw you two as the…as the mom and dad I've always..I've always wanted. P-p-please help me out. I'm down to my last smoke and I can't afford to buy a-anymore. Just give me a job here!" Koujaku's voiced cracked and raised to one whole octave.

Shiki and Rai looked at each other then back at Koujaku. The two reached out one of each of their hands and placed the on Koujaku's shoulders. The two then leaned closer towards Koujaku and whispered into his ears the most blunt, cold, and utterly cruel words imaginable.

"Give us back our fans…" Koujaku collapsed onto his knees as Shiki and Rai walked away from the broken man.

"Is everyone done now?" The man of the desk has asked in a tired manner, "Please leave the café you are disturbing the customers. Or would also like to say something sir?" The man said to Noiz. Noiz took his offer and walked towards the employees, but he had only one worker he wished to speak to.

"Tetsuo…"

"Noiz…"

Noiz cleared his throat before saying what he has desired to say for a long time, "Since I have nothing to lose, I'd just like to say that Junsei is MY SON!". Youji dropped all of the plates he was holding and looked at Tetsuo with a distraught look on his face. Rin and Zenya broke down into fits of laughter as Tetsuo picked up the largest cleaver he could find and threw it at Noiz.

"GET OUT!" The man of the desk lost all of his patience and demanded the Exectioners to kick out the fallen group that is Team Scrap out of the café.

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><p>I'm not even sorry…<p> 


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